2017: the highs and the lows

as most of you can tell I've been writing on this blog since I was a sophomore in highschool.

I am now a freshman in college and can I just say 2017-what 2018 has presented me has been the hardest best time?

Let us start with what the beginning of 2017 had in store for me.

I had my first kiss. I don't remember the date or the exact minute but it was there.

Honestly kinda awful but still. That actually might have been in December now that I think of it.

it doesn't really matter.

(long live the commie and the awkward
"do you like me?"
 "uh no"
*kisses me and then goes inside*)

I turned 18 in February. 

I got to watch my favorite band SOLARSUIT. 

They just remind me of being 15 and listening to their album on repeat everyday.

^video i made

I also went to my birthplace Berkeley for my eighteen birthday and what a magical time that was.

I think it reminds me of home. Even if i don't have tons of memories of California they are some of the only memories I have before like 6th grade.

We got to visit all my favorite places that i wanted to go to.

See all my old friends. walking around that campus is the biggest joy in my life.

i love that city. 

I saw every place I ever lived (in the east bay at least) and can I just say we lived in some dumps. haha we were so poor. But the house in Orinda looks exactly like i remembered it. 

I think my favorite part of northern California is the freeways. THEY ARE GREEN AND BEAUTIFUL

then off to cuba

we went to cuba and can I just say the food is soooo gross I do not recommend at all.





I also found out I was  #BYUBOUND

after that it was a pretty boring march and april.

I turned in the yearbook, went to the temple with friends and from what i can tell from the photos from march and april looked at a lot of memes etc.

Ah cuba sure was pretty though.

OKAY MAY


May was kind insane.
i turned in my ap art final.

(which honestly sucked but i passed so i don't care)



got a 3.9 GPA my senior year (WHAT??? IM A 3.3 GPA KINDA GIRL THIS WAS AMAZING)





we graduated
!!!!!


but i barely graduated.

here is my story on that.

i am not athletic.
anyone who knows me or even sees me get up from my couch knows that.
who doesn't know that?
gr*nite school district.

Apparently, in order to get a good education, I need to be able to run a mile in ten minutes.
 to graduate from high school that's all that was in my way.


so i get in some cute athletic clothes that i've never ever used to exercise
and went on the track after school.


holy heck nope.

I CAN"T EVEN JOG A MILE IN 12 MINUTES

how embarrassing to do that in front of the ENTIRE track team AND rugby team ???

My life was over, my education was scrapped because of my body.

i couldn't live this down.

and after that run, I had to do 7 pushups 20 situps and touch my toes for 30 seconds???


nope.
nah.
done.


so i failed. so that means that those four years of studying, exploring and definitely sleeping in this highschool was completely wasted.


but then a miracle.

it didn't count.

something about district and timers or something that i didn't care about at all.

I HAD A SECOND CHANCE.

so I "trained"

which means I would walk on the treadmill at home while eating chocolate and watching vampire diaries. for about 10 minutes. every other day.


so my training kinda sucked but I knew I had to make it!!


THE DAY ARRIVED


we drove to this far away hick highschool that I was definitely the only white girl walking those halls.

Somehow I touched my toes
i did the pushups
situps were a breeze.


THEN THEY TOLD ME I ONLY NEEDED TO PASS THOSE TO PASS THIS TEST


which means I walked that mile with gusto.

I listened to some jamming one direction
and walked.

and decided I just didn't care anymore.

And I walked that mile in 13 glorious minutes.

and I was graduating.

spoke at graduation too.

(see that post lol)




seniortrip.

i got a little sunburned to say the least.

but i love my salty sisters and loved california.




nowyou all know I traveled to jeruselem right after lake powell and that was just eye opening.

I honestly 10/10 recommend it.





OKAY THEN SUMMEr


these are the best days of my life. Just going to class twice a week making art or learning about families like best time ever.


Though i'll be honest I didn't go the first two weeks.
I was so nervous I couldn't do it.
everyone scared me.

I look back now and laugh because i love summer people.



I played all summer long.

I kissed boys, I laughed, I got no sleep, I gained a love for religion classes



I don't know but i felt so so so happy that whole summer I think i cried once and I can't remember why. So I feel like that is kinda awesome.

 I know it didn't make a lot of my friends from highschool happy that I just kinda lived and breathed summer but i'd never felt better.

Then I'll be honest. I needed to get away from home when summer ended.


SO first we went up to idaho and saw the eclipse and wow i loved it.

it was spiritual to be honest.

anyway sometimes you buy a plane ticket and eat mexican food every flipping day in sunny california with some of your best friends

^^^^ SERIOUSLY THE FOOD WAS TO DIE FOR UTAH WHERE IS YOUR GOOD FOOD??

Then fall came. We went to the state fair. had class at 9:30 am (note to future self YOU CAN NOT WALK UP BEFORE 11 DON"T TAKE CLASSES BEFORE THAT)

i don't know fall semester was tough but it was fun!

we did a lot of girls art nights that were so fun. honestly, we just sat in my room and painted for a couple hours and I was awful at it.

we also had soup a lot.

girls harry potter party what what.

Fall was pretty fun and good and I was sick for most of it

nowwwwww

December. 

it was tough. i had to say goodbye to a whole lot of people.

I had to try and pass my finals.

then home. 

i love home at christmas time but this year was kinda weird.

my dad fell from our living room ceiling.

I watched the whole thing and i guess I dont know it was scary, to say the least

luckily he only broke his femur in three places, his wrist and his face.

then my great grandmother died.  I loved her and her french accent killed me

So my grandparents (dad's parents) came out for that

thats when we all got very sick

the week was just miserable sick sick sick

then grandma and grandpa went home and dad got to come back from the hospital.

I got to go visit provo this weekend and just party it up and dance and see everyone and i loved that so much.

but then Saturday morning my grandpa coates died of the flu.

shocked.

that's what I can say about that. 

so you could say 2018 didn't start out awesome. 

lots of trials. but that's mortality. trials were to kinda my 2017.

I didn't add the hard times.

when i felt so sad I couldn't leave my dorm room for over a week.

or your best friend telling you he doesn't want to talk to you ever again 

or when all your friends leave for missions and you feel left out.

or my grandpa dying.

but i know that 2018 will be the best year yet.

it'll make me grow and learn and I will find happiness.

stay gold my friends\\