I often question myself. It's become quite a problem. Am I smart? People say I am but look at my grades, look at my ACT score look at my life. I'm not smart.
But then i look at what i have accomplished.
i started with post the day i got back from india.
i didn't really like india.
those are my honest initial thoughts when i got home.
i don't think often of this adventure.
though sometimes a little bit of it,
come back to me.
India -2016
I think often of this adventure.
I think of the girls. They clung to me. Wrapping their arms around my neck and arms and hands. Kisses all over my face.
I think of myself crying one night because I wanted to give up. I never felt more sad and alone. Yet.
I knew there was joy if I searched. If I sought out how happy the others were maybe I would find it. I hoped.
You know what? I might not have found it in India. I think I let others tell me to dislike it. I felt at peace though there. Never joyful though. But I think back and I'm happy.
Happiness is not my trip to India. It was the relationships that came out of it. They taught me to be powerful and stand strong for things. They taught me heartbreak and everlasting love. They taught me what it's like to have older brothers and friends. They taught me to love everyone no matter their mistakes in the past.
Not sure what I'm trying to say but I know that this trip built my testimony in a new way. There was a lack of spirit in India. So it made it that much more special when I came home.
Maybe it wasn't a favorite. Maybe that's okay. But I know that there are girls out there thinking of me and ymad with hope. Hope we will come back. Hope of education and a future.
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